Tuesday, July 19, 2011

It's Not As Bad As It Sounds

Those of you who've been reading this awhile know that I struggle with depression. I'm in the midst of it right now, exacerbated by the 100+° temperatures we've been having almost daily for the past six weeks or so.

Even when the weather is pleasant, I often find that my depression is worse in the evenings. I rarely go to bed in what could be called a happy or 'up' state of mind. The last time, in fact, was probably right after I retired four years ago.

Most of the posts on this blog are written late at night or early in the morning. It's 12:32 AM as I write this, for example. But right now, I'm mindful enough to 'step outside' my depression for a moment and look at it more objectively than I usually do.

Most of the time, though, when I post in the middle of the night, I'm in a much more depressed state than I am in the morning or in the middle of the day. The cumulative effect, over five and a half years of blogging, is to create the impression that I am much more depressed than I actually am.

1 comment:

John X said...

Visit Vienna, where low-level depression and a strange fascination with death has long been a part of the fabric of the society.