Back in August, I wrote this post about some changes I felt like I was experiencing. Although I can't find it now, I recall that I wrote in a later post that my libido had suddenly kicked into high gear, back to where it was in my twenties and thirties.
Here are some random notes about what's happened since then:
- I dropped by the willowy, ethereal Buddhist woman's house a few weeks ago, and visited for a couple of hours. It seems as if the last glowing coals of lust there have finally died for me. I suppose they could reignite later, but it really seemed as if there was just nothing there that day.
- As I wrote previously, I joined three online dating sites. Match.com has proven to be a complete bust for me this time around, but I'm getting a lot of responses on Plenty of Fish and OK Cupid, especially since writing my 'nothing but bad news' profiles.
Plenty of Fish has connected me with a lot of marginally literate women posing on their Harleys, but I've found some truly interesting women on OK Cupid. I've tentatively set up face-to-face meetings with two of them after Thanksgiving. One of them is six feet tall! I can't tell you how long I've wanted to date someone as tall as I am. I've seen a lot of women's scalps in my life, and most of the women I've dated have come up to somewhere between my elbow and my shoulder.
- And yet, as I develop all these contacts, I find my libido is decreasing again, and my desire for solitude is once again on the rise. I suspect that one of my blood pressure medications is partly responsible.
Another probable contributor is the stress involved in making myself 'date worthy.' I haven't dated or had the desire to date for about five years, and because of that, I've let a lot of stuff go. The house is a mess, and not particularly suited to entertaining even one person. My cars are both full of junk. There's laundry everywhere, as usual. And there are probably many other things I haven't even thought about.
- Another random note: I blacked out at the doctor's office Tuesday. They had just taken blood for tests, and I had gone to the counter to pay for the visit. I suddenly became nauseated and dizzy. The receptionist asked me if I was all right, and I mustered enough focus to reply, 'No, I'm not.'
She had me go sit in a chair in the lobby. I had been there a minute or two, with my head down, when I heard someone ask, 'How long was he unconscious?' Another voice replied, 'Just a second or two, but he convulsed before he blacked out.'
I, of course, had not even been aware I had lost consciousness. The nurse put me in a wheelchair and rolled me into an examining room, where they put me on a table. I think they took my blood pressure while I was in the lobby, but I wasn't aware of it at the time. They took it again in the examining room, where it was 85 over 20-something.
They kept me about a half hour while my BP slowly elevated to normal. My doctor told me this was a normal response to having blood drawn, and that about three patients a week experience the same thing.
I mentioned to him that I had undergone several blood tests over the years without this happening. But I forgot to mention that it was similar to the time I blacked out in my own back yard about three years ago.
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